简单英语美文
简单经典英语美文篇一
Funny or not?
Whether we find a joke funny or not largely depends on where we have been brought up. The sense of humour is mysteriously bound up with national characteristics. A Frenchman, for instance, might find it hard to laugh at a Russian joke. In the same way, a Russian might fail to see anything amusing in a joke which would make an Englishman laugh to tears.
Most funny stories are based on comic situations. In spite of national differences, certain funny situations have a universal appeal. No matter where you live, you would find it difficult not to laugh at, say, Charlie Chaplin's early films. However, a new type of humour, which stems largely from America, has recently come into fashion. It is cal1ed' sick humour '. Comedians base their jokes on tragic situations like violent death or serious accidents. Many people find this sort of joke distasteful. The following example of 'sick humour' will enable you to judge for yourself.
A man who had broken his right leg was taken to hospital a few weeks before Christmas. From the moment he arrived there, he kept on pestering his doctor to tell him when he would be able to go home. He dreaded having to spend Christmas in hospital. Though the doctor did his best, the patient's recovery was slow. On Christmas day, the man still had his right leg in plaster. He spent
a miserable day in bed thinking of all the fun he was missing. The following day, however, the doctor consoled him by telling him that his chances of being able to leave hospital in time for New Year celebrations were good. The man took heart and, sure enough, on New Year's Eve he was able to hobble along to a party. To compensate for his unpleasant experiences in hospital, the man drank a little more than was good for him. In the process, he enjoyed himself thoroughly and kept telling everybody how much he hated hospitals. He was still mumbling something about hospitals at the end of the party when he slipped on a piece of ice and broke his left leg.
我们觉得一则笑话是否好笑，很大程度取决于我们是在哪儿长大的。幽默感与民族有着神秘莫测的联系。譬如，法国人听完一则俄国笑话可能很难发笑。同样的道理，一则可以令英国人笑出泪来的笑话，俄国人听了可能觉得没有什么可笑之处。
大部分令人发笑的 故事 都是根据喜剧情节编写的。尽管民族不同，有些滑稽的情节却能产生普遍的效果。比如说，不管你生活在哪里，你看查理.卓别林的早期电影很难不发笑。然而，近来一种新式幽默流行了起来，这种幽默主要来自美国。它被叫作“病态幽默”。喜剧演员根据悲剧情节诸如暴死，重大事故等来编造笑话。许多人认为这种笑话是低级庸俗的。下面是个“病态幽默”的实例，你可据此自己作出判断。
圣诞节 前几周，某人摔断了右腿被送进医院。从他进医院那一刻时，他就缠住医生，让医生告诉他什么时候能回家。他十分害怕在医院过圣诞。尽管医生竭力医治，但病人恢复缓慢。圣诞节那天，他的右腿还上着石膏，他在床上郁郁不乐地躺了一天，想着他错过的种种欢乐。然而，第二天，医生安慰他说，出院欢度新年的可能性还是很大的，那人听后振作了精神。果然， 除夕 时他可以一瘸一拐地去参加晚会了。为了补偿住院这一段不愉快的经历，那人喝得稍许多了一点。在晚会上他尽情娱乐，一再告诉大家他是多么讨厌医院。晚会结束时，他嘴里还在嘟哝着医院的事，突然踩到一块冰上滑倒了，摔断了左腿。
简单经典英语美文篇二
The death of a ghost
For years villagers believed that Endley farm was haunted. The farm was owned by two brothers, Joe and Bert Cox. They employed a few farm hands, but no one was willing to work there long. Every time a worker gave up his job, he told the same story. Farm labourers said that they always woke up to find the work had been done overnight. Hay had been cut and cow sheds had been cleaned. A farm worker, who stayed up all night, claimed to have seen a figure cutting corn in the
moonlight. In time, it became an accepted fact that the Cox brothers employed a conscientious ghost that did most of their work for them.
No one suspected that there might be someone else on the farm who had never been seen. This was indeed the case. A short time ago, villagers were astonished to learn that the ghost of Endley had died. Everyone went to the funeral, for the 'ghost' was none other than Eric Cox, a third brother who was supposed to have died as a young man. After the funeral, Joe and Bert revealed
a secret which they had kept for over forty years. Eric had been the eldest son of the family. He had been obliged to join the army during the first World War. As he hated army life he decided to desert his regiment. When he learnt that he would be sent abroad, he returned to the farm and his farther hid him until the end of the war. Fearing the authorities, Eric remained in hiding after the war as well. His father told everybody that Eric had been killed in action. The only other people who knew the secret were Joe and Bert. They did not even tell their wives. When their father died, they thought it their duty to keep Eric in hiding. All these years, Eric had lived as a recluse(隐遁者, 寂寞者). He used to sleep during the day and work at night, quite unaware of the fact that he had become the ghost of Endley. When he died, however, his brothers found it impossible to keep the secret any longer.
多年来，村民们一直认为恩得利农场在闹鬼。恩得利农场属于乔.考科斯和鲍勃.考科斯兄弟俩所有。他们雇了几个农工，但谁也不愿意在那儿长期工作下去。每次雇工辞职后都叙述着同样的故事。雇工们说，常常一早起来发现有人在夜里把活干了，干草已切好，牛棚也打扫干净了。有一个彻夜未眠的雇工还声称他看见一个人影在月光下收割庄稼。随着时间的流逝，考科斯兄弟雇了一个尽心尽责的鬼，他们家的活大部分都让鬼给干了，这件事成了公认的事实。
谁也没想到农场竟会有一个从未露面的人。但事实上确有此人。不久之前，村民们惊悉恩得利农场的鬼死了。大家都去参加了葬礼，因为那“鬼”不是别人，正是农场主的兄弟埃里克.考科斯。人们以为埃里克年轻时就死了。葬礼之后，乔和鲍勃透露了他们保守了长达50多年的秘密。
埃里克是这家长子。年龄比他两个弟弟大很多，第二次世界大战期间被迫参军。他讨厌军旅生活，决定逃离所在部队。当他了解自己将被派遣 出国 时，他逃回农场，父亲把他藏了起来，直到战争结束。由于害怕当局，埃里克战后继续深藏不露。他的父亲告诉大家，埃里克在战争中被打死了。除此之外，只有乔与鲍知道这个秘密。但他俩连自己的妻子都没告诉。父亲死后，他们兄弟俩认为有责任继续把埃里克藏起来。这些年来，埃里克过着隐士生活，白天睡觉，夜里出来干活，一点不知道自己已成了恩得利家场的活鬼。他死后，他的弟弟们才觉得无法再保守这个秘密了。
简单经典英语美文篇三
The double life of Alfred Bloggs
These days, people who do manual work often receive far more money than clerks who work in offices. People who work in offices are frequently referred to as' white collar workers' for the simple reason that they usually wear a collar and tie to go to work. Such is human nature, that a great many people are often willing to sacrifice higher pay for the privilege of becoming white collar workers. This can give rise to curious situations, as it did in the case of Alfred Bloggs who worked as a dustman for the Ellesmere Corporation.
When he got married, Alf was too embarrassed to say anything to his wife about his job. He simply told her that he worked for the Corporation. Every morning, he left home dressed in a smart black suit. He then changed into overalls (n.工作服) and spent the next eight hours as a dustman. Before returning home at night, he took a shower and changed back into his suit. Alf did this for over two years and his fellow dustmen kept his secret. Alf's wife has never discovered that she married a dustman and she never will, for Alf has just found another job. He will soon be working in an office as a junior clerk. He will be earning only half as much as he used to, but he feels that his rise in status is well worth the loss of money. From now on, he will wear a suit all day and others will call him 'Mr. Bloggs', not 'Alf'.
如今，从事体力劳动的人的收入一般要比坐办公室的人高出许多。坐办公室的之所以常常被称作“白领工人”，就是因为他们通常是穿着硬领白衬衫，系着领带去上班。许多人常常情愿放弃较高的薪水以换取做白领工人的殊荣，此乃人之常情。而这常常会引起种种奇怪的现象，在埃尔斯米尔公司当清洁工的艾尔弗雷德.布洛斯就是一个例子。
艾尔弗结婚时，感到非常难为情，而没有将自己的职业告诉妻子。他只说在埃尔斯米尔公司上班。每天早晨，他穿上一身漂亮的黑色西装离家上班，然后换上工作服，当8个小时清洁工。晚上回家前，他洗个淋浴，重新换上那身黑色西服。两年多以来，艾尔弗一直这样，他的同事也为他保守秘密。艾尔弗的妻子一直不知道她嫁给了一个清洁工，而且她永远也不会知道了，因为艾尔弗已找到薪职，不久就要坐办公室里工作了。他将来挣的钱只有他现在的一半。不过他觉得，地位升高了，损失点儿钱也值得。从此，艾尔弗可以一天到晚穿西服了。别人将称呼他为“布洛格斯先生”，而不再叫他“艾尔弗”了。
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